Stable Confidence Part 3 of 4: Interest Curiosity
Credit: Dr. Raymond Prior (Golf Beneath The Surface)
Contrary to popular belief, confidence doesn’t have to be situational or performance outcome dependent. This blog series will be delving into the work of Dr. Raymond Prior (Golf Beneath The Surface) as it relates to the following four behaviors, and how they can help us develop long term stable confidence:
Acceptance
Groundedness
Interest Curiosity
Connection to Values
Part 3: Interest Curiosity
As we discussed in Parts 1 and 2, the ability to accept all outcomes pre and post-performance while connecting to the present moment during performance are several of the major challenges of playing and competing on the golf course, and are keys to developing stable confidence. In the following Part 3, we will discuss the most relevant influence on groundedness and acceptance: interest curiosity…
We’ve all experienced an overbearing parent before (either directly or indirectly). They project outcome goals that are authentic to themselves - not the child, conjure imaginary margins of error that are much smaller than they actually are, and through their behaviors create consequences that are pervasive, permanent and far too personal. It’s not unusual to hear them badger their child with questions immediately following (or even during) poor performance that resemble the following:
“How could you have let that happen?”
“Aren’t you better than that?”
“Why do you always ___?”
While this may seem like curiosity on the surface, there’s an underlying level of judgment rather than a genuine desire to acquire information.
Our brains can often times ask ourselves similar questions as in the overbearing parent analogy. As we discussed in Behavior Change 101/201/301, our brain is “doing something” that has been reinforced to make us feel good, or avoid danger (in this instance - protecting the ego). If we map out an example for context:
Trigger: *Ball launches left of the intended dispersion and lands in a penalty area.*
Behavior: Internal dialogue: “How could I hit such a poor shot?”
Reward: Feels good to protect my perceived aptitude as a player.
The player in the example above has likely lower levels of acceptance and is therefore multitasking between different time frames that do not exist (worrying about a past event to bring certainty to a future outcome). To help bring attention back to what is relevant to performance in the present, the player could explore using interest curiosity
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